my dad doesn't get the internet

Me: You need to learn how to look through pictures on my Flickr. There's a bunch of photos of you there and you don't even know.

Him: OF COURSE THERE IS NOT. I never put anything on there... You know what I also don't get? The Facebook thing. You put your face on there? Is that what you do? Put your face on there and that's it?

Me: Have you ever even google yourself?

Him: Ok, now WHY would I EVER do that?

Me: There's a bunch of stuff about you there too.

Him: Yeah, I never put anything on there either.

hidden treasure

A customer review of Bic Crystal Ballpoint Pen, Medium Point, Black

by Matthew R. Balousek

"Upon receiving my order, I carefully opened the box and dug through the packing peanuts in order to get to the pen contained therein. 'Beautiful!', I thought, and promptly opened up my moleskine notebook to jot down to myself some notes. My previous pen had ran out of ink four weeks prior and I didn't want to splurge on expensive shipping, which meant I had a lot of notes to catch up on writing.

But, when that quality carbide ball touched the surface of the paper, it was not ink that came out. From a distance I heard the screams of men and the cackling of innumerable ravens. I stopped, cold and sweating profusely. I looked down at the Bic Crystal black medium ballpoint pen which I held in my hand, only to see darkness. I dashed it against the wall, recoiling in horror. I saw in the corner of my eye my faithful notebook, which now lay on the ground. Once unmarred, I saw now the small mark which I had made with the devil's own pen. It spread across the page like a plague, and looking at it I gazed upon true horrors. For, what I thought had been ink was in fact a portal to a dark, unforgiving dimension. A portal whose maw was now widening to engulf all hope and joy in the world.

'God, what have I done?' I exclaimed as I weeped and fell to my knees, 'What have I done?'

From beyond the Dark Gate I heard these words, words which I can never forget. A terrible, booming voice said to me, 'Ia! Ia! Cthulhu Fthagn!'

I ran, blindly stumbling, away from that place and never looked back. My only hope is that none shall follow in the path I've walked down, too blinded by hubris to realize my follies."

[link]

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Thanks, @Alelex88, you endless source of awesomeness!

if you´re gonna do it, do it right

"...pumping an RSS feed into Twitter alone doesn’t really merit a lot of attention. There’s no non-story 'Twitter exclusive' comments from Salon’s editorial staff, no “@ replies” with the Twitter audience, no follows. No real social media engagement, in other words." [link]

In other words, if your blog is also on Twitter, be relevant in both platforms without being redundant. If I want to know when you post something new, I'll subscribe to your feed. Get it right, will ya?


Thanks, Ferds!

did you know?

my internet

"1. My Internet doesn’t use flash, evahhh. Unless it’s a video, and then only for video.

2. My Internet prefers html text wherever possible.

3. My Internet lets me use my email address or my usual username as a username. It doesn’t give me one or make me create a new one.

4. My Internet lets me use a password entirely of my own choosing. It doesn’t make me add numbers or Capitals wH3re I don’t want them.

5. My Internet values simplicity and clarity over almost everything else.

6. My Internet prefers tools that I’m familiar with like Flickr, YouTube, iTunes, Google etc. It doesn’t reinvent convention for the sake of it.

7. My Internet has a screen resolution of 1024×768. Today. As I write this. That will change sooner than you think.

8. My Internet has absolute urls for everything.

9. My Internet may not have exactly the same colours as My Printed Matter.

10. If My Internet was forced to choose between speed and visual lushness, speed would win easily.

11. My Internet has no back, forward or print buttons. That’s what My Browser is for.

12. My Internet has contact details clearly accessible right from the word go.

13. My Internet will not work for everyone, everywhere, always, at the same time, all the time. It will especially not work for CEO’s Aunties.”

+++++++

(my 2 cents)

14. My internet does not resize my browser window, unless I do it myself.

15. My internet lets me know when a link is being used to carry a PDF. It always tells me that if I click there, something will be downloaded to my desktop. It also tells me the size.

16. My internet is not like high school. No more popular kids, no whuffies, no clicks. I'm too old for that, thank you very much.

17. My internet is borderless. It strives to make its content accessible to users from all over the world. It's not based on local memes and trendy behaviors.


[via]

email exchange with my brother in law

I sent him an email telling him for the 25th time this week to start using Twitter. I'm always pushing him to be as "virtual" as I am and join every social network I am part of. His response:

If I join all those mechanisms, I can't work;

If I can't work, I can't pay the bills of our house;

If I don't pay the bills, your sister and I will have to move to a third floor apartment with no stairs;

Then, with less space, we'll argue more;

With more arguing, less babies;

Less trips;

Less love.

The internet is against love.

i'm embarrassed but i must tell

Below is the screen shot of the summary of a lawsuit filed with a Electoral Court in Brazil. The site might be down because the huge number of visits today's incident caused:


"PT, BRAZIL WORKERS PARTY (the President's party!), WANTS TO TAKE TWITTER OFF THE AIR.

The Story
Somebody created a fake profile of Luiziane Lins, one of PT's candidates standing in the election for Mayor of Fortaleza, Ceará. She filed a lawsuit in order to remove the profile from Twitter – which is a legitimate right she has.

But she went beyond.

As if removing that specific profile wasn't enough, she filed a lawsuit in order to TAKE TWITTER OFF THE INTERNET. That's right: the WHOLE site. Something like taking the whole MSN Instant Messenger system down, or even Facebook, Myspace or Orkut because of one fake profile.

Sickening.

To make matters worse, that lawsuit was combined with the lack of "internetical" knowledge of a magistrate, causing what we saw today: an approved order to take TWITTER OFF THE AIR.

The Absurdity

- The lawsuit asked the justice system to take the WHOLE site down, not just one profile;

- They approved such request;

- The Regional Electoral Court of the state of Ceará took off the air a BLOG WHICH SUBJECT MATTER IS TWITTER, not Twitter itself. It's bizarre not only that they actually went forward with the lawsuit request, but they also suspended a BLOG.

- Twitter is not a national site. Because of that, the order of the Court in Ceará will never reach its servers. Just like it happened with Youtube once in Brazil, maybe the "solution" is to determine that EVERY SINGLE NATIONAL INTERNET PROVIDER should remove forwarding service to Twitter's URLs - check out the size of the problem."

Beautiful, huh? Being from here is so fucking embarrassing sometimes.

[this post was translated from this post here, of Imprensa Marrom. I wish you all knew portuguese, because he's brilliant]

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The imature 13 year-old kid that lives inside of me couldn't be stopped. So here it is:

LOSER!
(she said it, not me)

hooked like me

music, aesthetics and the internet

I found this at the always great SwissMiss and I ended up reading the whole thing. The text is brilliantly written by Will Sheff.

"Because my work is the most important thing in the world to me, I sometimes feel uncomfortable about it existing freely in the digital Library of Babel, these songs that I worked so hard writing and revising and rehearsing and recording and mixing (and re-mixing) and mastering (and re-mastering) shucked off the album and thrown up on the internet in hissy and brittle low-resolution versions with no kind of sequence or order, mixed in with odd leaked tracks and some sub-par live versions. In a world overstuffed with stimuli and choking on information, I feel like a musical album should have a kind of purity and a kind of wholeness, that every aspect of an album – from the sequencing to the artwork even down to the typesetting – should feels labored over and loved, and that the finished product should feel like a gift."