go burn a bra. NOW.

breaking news

via Chris Brown

"Sonia, say www.youtube.com"

ponto = dot :: www(ponto)youtube(ponto)com

murder plots and colored books

Update from yesterday: The hairdresser emailed-me himself and tried to apologize in his own obnoxious disgusting manner, by not saying he was sorry but by telling me he could appreciate why I felt disrespected. I didn't expect anything beyond that, beside seeing his ass on the street covered in shit holding a sign that reads "will work for food".

---

Update for yesterday no.2: I just received an email from one of the owners. Here's a small part:
"Hi Ana, My name is N. and I just wanted to let you know that I am sorry that I was unable to take you for your appt. I have a firm policy that a client can not be more than 12 min. late for an appt so that all stays on time. I do that so everyones schedules are as close to the time scheduled as possible only in emergencies do I make exceptions. I did need to leave the salon at 1pm and had a schedule for my afternoon. I felt that you needed to hear this from me so that I would extent my courtesy to you. Please feel free to reschedule if wanted.
Sincerely
N."

---

Besides spending my whole day and night plotting ways to kill the mother fucker, I took some time to organize my books by color. My goal was to make them look like this:



I would just like to say it here that THERE IS NO WAY THAT PHOTO WAS NOT PHOTOSHOPED OR THAT WHOEVER DID THAT THING DID NOT HAND-PAINTED HIS BOOKS. IMPOSSIBLE!! I dare anyone to try to, send me a picture and prove me wrong. Please. Thanks.

the day a hairdresser almost made me choke the bitch out of him

Bad customer service has a new meaning to me. I have officially seen the worst. And I have seen some real fucked up ones...

This is an email I just sent to the owner of the hair salon where I had an appointment today. I was completely verbally assaulted by a very flamboyant and orange hair stylist who did nothing short of rolling his eyes and neck at me. He made me see red for about an hour. Maybe three. Now my mission is just to get him fired:

(note that I'm not posting their names here. In case they don't reply to me within a day, I will post their link. Then you're all welcome to send them hate mail for me. Thanks in advance.)

"Dear XXXXXXX Hair Designs owners,

I'm taking time out of a busy day to write you this email after experiencing the worst, most disrespectful and humiliating customer service I have ever seen. It happened earlier today, at 12:45am, after I arrived late to one of my appointments at your salon.

I would like to open a parenthesis here and explain that I am a designer/branding professional who works on a daily basis on helping companies create a positive perception with the public, and what I experienced in your salon was nothing short ofappalling. I was very impressed with the organization of the website and the online booking alternative, and I was looking forward to seeing how my experience in your business would be. Evidently, it wasn't the best.

I schedule an appointment online for 12:30pm with N., who I believe is also one of the owners. Sometime before 9am this morning (Tuesday, July 17) somebody called me and asked me if it was ok to re-schedule my appointment with N. at 11:30am instead. Because I wouldn't be able to make, we rescheduled with another girl, still at 12:30pm. I was still very glad with the treatment I was given; the person who called me was extremely polite and made sure I was contacted early enough in case I had to change plans.

On my way to my appointment, I was running late. At 12:35pm I called the salon from my car, while I was stranded in traffic, and told the receptionist that I would be there in about 5 minutes. I apologized for being late and nothing was said about the inability of the hairstylist of making the appointment. When I got to the salon, at almost 12:45pm, I was told that the person I had schedule with had left because she had to pick up her child. I understood that I was late, and if the person had to go, I couldn't blame her, but I thought it was pertinent to bring up the question about an appointment being made at 12:30 when the stylist has to be gone by 12:45. Sounds awfully quick to me, but I didn't mean to challenge the the competence of the salon or the employee. It was a logical question, asked respectfully, not ONCE getting personal with any of the people involved.

So I asked "why was the appointment made at 12:30 if she had to be out by 12:45"? The question was made to the girl sitting in the reception area.

That's when J.B. (I see his photo on the website, that's why I know his name) stepped in and quickly responded "Why are you late"? I explained to him that I had called about running late. I also said that I was referred to the salon by a friend who really likes the salon, and that's why I was there, and that I couldn't understand why he was being so rude to me. He then when on a rampage, telling me "no to tell them how to book", "maybe my friend likes it because she's on time", "he didn't care what I thought", and ended by telling me "I was shocked because he was calling me out, and apparently I'm not used to it." All of that in a VERY standoffish and offensive tone.

I was ABSOLUTELY speechless. All I could say was that I was shocked, that he was completed over-reacting, that I would just call and re-schedule and that that was terrible customer service. I left and walked to my car oblivious, knowing that I would make the owners aware of the incident.

I'm writing you as a person who was extremely impressed with the service offered to me before I entered that place, and was looking forward to becoming a regular customer, since I live nearby. What your employee did to me was despicable, and he made SURE I NEVER, EVER STEP INTO THAT PLACE AGAIN. Not because the hairstylist wasn't there - I could live with that, because I know was late. But because I absolutely refuse to be a customer of a place that will let an employee greet a guest like Jeremy Brown did. This is not an attack at your salon. This is to make you aware of the treatment given to me by one of your associates, while other employees stood around watching him flat out personally disrespect me and my character.

I will make sure my friends who are already your customers don't ever return to that salon. I will also make this incident known to fellow PR colleagues who are a very tight community in this town. My goal is not to hurt your business, but it is to make a statement against this kind of behavior, which I'm sure directly affects the image of your salon.

I hope you take this email into consideration and somehow use it to your benefit. I wish you all luck and hope you realize that at the end of the day, those who work for or with you represent what you and your business stand for.
Hopefully that was just a REALLY bad first impression."

Hopefully the bitch is gone by now.

hospital and stuff

The past two days have been filled with running around to and from the hospital, making sure my friend is ok. I'm tired, but it's good to feel useful.

Here are four things I'm looking forward to:
1. Laying by the pool for at least half of my day tomorrow.
2. Getting the new prints I just got from Etsy framed and hung on my newly painted walls.
3. Seeing my best friend from Brazil next weekend/week. Ah! I can't wait.
4. Going to NY! (I think on the 27th. Not sure. But Yay for that anyway!)

Want to hear something great? I installed the "Honesty Box" application on my Facebook profile. Here's their quick description of it:

"Honesty Box lets you find out what your friends really think about you, your haircut, your body, your friends etc, by putting a box on your profile that people can use to send you anonymous messages. You can even reply to your anonymous messages!"

So far I got one. Check this out:



Ah! Isn't this great? I love that application. I'm just hoping someone else will write me and actually tell me something new. I replied to that first one, of course: "I know... I try to work on it, I really do, but when I realize, I already said it! Sorry! Hope I haven't ever been rude to you. I'm not a mean person, I just don't have great manners..."

Ok, big deal. Somebody told me I'm rude. What a shocker; I haven't heard that one before. But really, I don't see myself as a rude person. I'm just very honest, and I'm very good at voicing my opinion at all times. I don't mean to hurt anybody's feelings, I don't want to be evil. For real, I don't. Seriously. Get over it, people. Grow some balls or something. And please send me more comments.

I'm super tired. Good night, peeps.

open heart

This morning one of my closest friends here in Indianapolis had open heart surgery. I was his "person" in the hospital, the one they would come to and give updates throughout the process. The one who had to go and have a consult with the doctor after the procedure, to make sure I understood what was happening, and to know how to update his family of his condition (my friend is also from Brazil, and his whole family lives there. So yeah, I am his person.)

He's ok for now and I think be ok overall. He has to. It's just a weird feeling of being unsure and hoping to God that I don't have to be the one to ever deliver bad news. Or to have to lose a close friend.

I wrote about this the other day, but more and more I feel it around me. And surround me almost like a hug. I have an amazing family I was born into, and I have a family here too, and I didn't know what true, real, commited friendship was like until I moved thousands and thousands of miles from home . Until I got to a place where we were all alone, and we all had to rely on one another. To trust each other as we would trust a brother or a sister. It's a very good feeling, and it takes leaving your comfort zone to figure it out. I'm glad I did.

I know that if it was me there, I wouldn't be alone.

----

Update: I just got a call and he's off the respirator and asked where he was. Yay!

Poor Blitzo!

This is an awesome "monologue" between Michael Moore and Wolf Blitzer. It's just so sad how Wolf keeps trying to defend Dr. Gupta and can't get one word across. Worth watching every second of it.

you do what you gotta do

FROM PULITZER TO PARIS HILTON.
"He received a Pulitzer Prize for a memorable Vietnam War photograph. Now, Nick Ut has again snapped an image that says a lot about the times."

Dude. Seriously.

a-ok

I was reading some posts from a while ago and all of a sudden I missed writing. I mean, ACTUALLY WRITING, so that months from now I can come back here and see how I was feeling at 5:37, on July 5th, 2007. I'm at work, and my dog is here with me. That's how it is pretty much every day. I wake up around 8am, take a shower, put on something comfortable, usually with flip-flops, get Puppy and head out to work. The environment here is pretty laid back, and I get to work with some people who I actually like. Then I leave, maybe grab something to eat on my way home, walk my dog for a while, talk on the phone with a couple of friends, then maybe someone comes by, or we'll go out to dinner, and then I watch really bad TV.

Some people would say this is the most boring life in the world (including me sometimes), but the fact is that I am in a good place. I have an apartment I love, a job that even though doesn't really challenge me too much (or at all most of the time) but allows me to have a pretty stress-free life and doesn't require me to wear shoes or leave my dog alone at home. I have also been taking better care of myself and keeping my anxiety under control, and that is a huge deal to me. Last year being just normal was my main goal. Most of all, I have few but REAL friends. I look back, about 3 years ago, I knew so many people! I was always around strangers, a constant hang-out with people whose last name I didn't even know.

Now I have the real deal. It's like I have sorted trough everybody and kept the ones who I can really call if I get stranded on the highway. And they would actually come. Or those who would stay with me until 3 o'clock in the morning if I ever felt like I didn't want to be alone. Or those who call to check on me at least twice a week. I might not even see them that often, but I know they are there. I am happy with them. And I'm happy with things in general.

My best guy-friend from Brazil is coming to visit this month, and I CANNOT WAIT TO SEE HIM. I've been looking forward to that, and I've been looking forward to other things I can't quite mention now. So I'm finally ok.

And I'm finally getting comfortable with the fact that it's ok to just to be ok. This might be the Lexapro talking, but really - am I wrong?

past two days

haircut

Victoria Beckam, William Sledd, and Maggie.

balls swalled

That's what somebody was looking for when they found my blog.

A Love Letter to Ann Coulter

This is fabulous. And she's the devil. Crazy bony-ass-man-looking bitch.

Here's the transcript:

"Dear Ann:

You used to be fun; at least funny. At least gently and amusingly insane, but girlfriend, you’ve changed! The thousand-yard stare you’ve acquired in the last couple of years says lonely nights, too much wine and insecurity about the future of your career. Where to now, my sweet fascist? Another one of your silly books? More hilarious appearances on Hannity & Colmes? Bill Maher has to be tired of you by now.

You’re anything but stupid and by now , you must see the writing on the wall. You’ll never have a real place with the Beltway in crowd, as they see you as a northeastern, hickoid, pro wrestler, Nascar type with a degree from Cornell. I mean, really, Ann; where can it go from here? Ann, I think I have the answer, in fact, I know I do.

I want to hire you, Ann. I want you to come and work for me. I want you to be my “Ann Friday,” my housekeeper, beekeeper, floor, chimney and minesweeper, my window-washing, grocery-buying, dinner-cooking, obsequious, submissive concubine-domestic.

You will laugh at my jokes, celebrate my victories and lament my failures. You will praise my friends and vow great harm upon all who oppose me. You will treat me like a god, a guru, a mentor – and the best night in the sack you’ve ever had. You will carry my bags, wash my cars, walk my dogs and turn your savings over to me. You will massage Susan Sarandon’s aching shoulders, whip up vegan delights for Hanoi Jane Fonda, and loofah Barbra Streisand’s stretch marks.

But most of all, Ann, you will just shut the fuck up.

I can offer you a life of obedient servitude on my compound; in your time with me, you will learn much. You will learn that America is made up of people from all races, walks of life and sexual orientation and that it’s all OK. You will learn to be patient and kind. You will learn the meaning of the word “respect” and memorize every line of Caddyshack. You will listen to The Ramones, Black Sabbath and the Brides of Funkenstein. You’re a figure of fun and I plan on having fun with that figure. You will learn who your daddy is, that’s for sure.

But mostly, Ann, you will just the fuck up.

Come on, Anne, ya fuckin’ psycho; let’s do this!

Henry"

just in case you were wondering...

...what I would look like if I ever broke my wrist, here it is.



Pretty, huh? i fell ON MY ASS at work, 2 inches from hitting the wall with my face, so i figure it would be best to land on my hand. I'm in a little bit of pain, and small things like hooking my bra, buttoning up my pants, wiping myself, taking a shower and starting the car have become a nightmare. i'm supposed to go to the doctor next week for another x-ray and to see when i'll be able to take this cast off.

this is it for now. typing is hard too. update soon.

pluto

This can't be good for his self-esteem. Pluto, we all feel like you sometimes...

eagle vs shark

I've been waiting anxiously for Eagle vs Shark to come out, and guess what? It's out today! But guess what? It's not playing anywhere in Indianapolis. And I'm furious with that, as you might imagine. So if you live somewhere where this movie will be playing please go watch it and let me know how much you loved it and how much Indianapolis fucking blows for not picking it up!

s l o w a n d b a r e l y h e r e

So I have moved to my new apartment and this is now my third week here. I love it so far, everything I would need on a daily basis (besides my job) is pretty much walking distance from here: Target, movie theaters, grocery stores, an Apple store, shopping malls, restaurants (russian, thai, brazilian, japanese, chinese, you name it) - everything right around the corner. But since nothing is perfect in this world of mine, wireless Internet here sucks. I can pick up one open signal if I place 1/3 olf my computer on the edge of the desk that sits in my small and improvised office. I will be posting a photo that displays the fragility of my Internet situation tomorrow from work, because of course, the network at home is not stable enough to wait for all those ENORMOUS PIXELS FROM MY GIGANTIC 500K JPEG PHOTO TO UPLOAD. God damn it, me and all those pixels trying to get online. What the fuck, right?

But of course, the beautiful provider of my very expensive cable TV will also be allowing me to use the Internet comfortably from my very own rented home for the mere price of $30 some dollars a month. What a deal. Thanks Comcast, you rock! I could be out there jogging or spending my hours in the crazy outdoors, but you sure know how to keep me in here and watch my ass get bigger by the minute. Comcast, you... silly... cable provider!

Work has been crazy busy and I haven't had time to do much besides actual work, which totally blows. Hope this trend changes soon.

Here are some things that have been occupying my time or rocking my world: my best friend's home-made lettuce wraps, Paris Hilton in jail, Amy Winehouse, Patty Griffin, new photos and prints I bought from Talbott Street Art Fair, Icy-Hot patch to heal the crazy pain I had on my neck for 3 days after spending the night on a really hard couch, and of course my new 26'' flat screen TV (I had one ridiculously banged up TV that went to the trash before the move. I could only watch really bright shows on it, because the darks were REALLY DARK. Now I can watch shows I really like, instead of shows I pick based on contrast).

I'll be hooking up my new high-speed cable tomorrow, so more to come!

Because my sister asked me to

Even shorter!

We both have been working really hard